Mad Dreams

I woke up the other day from a geology dream where I was excited to bust out my hand lens and identify the grains in a rock. Some people like to call these nightmares or bad dreams, but since I'm a little crazy, I'll call them Mad Dreams: proof that attending Mines has ruined me. This post has taken me four years to write because every time I have a super nerdy dream, I try to write it down here.

I had another science dream last night. I woke up disturbed, not by the dream, but by the fact that I should really just finally publish this post. In my dream, I was at a Geophysics conference with my classmate Emily H. We had a big homework assignment due the next day, though, which consisted of taking partial derivatives of things that were in a three-by-three matrix. The conference was also an amusement park, and all our professors were there.

But let's start with my dreams from the beginning, all the way back from freshman year...

I had a dream that I was in Green Center 215 in Calc II. For some reason we were doing the test in class (tests for this class are done after class). I wrote my name and did one problem. I had to go get something, so I left the room and building and went to go get it. It ended up taking longer than I thought. I think I went to the grocery store to get some milk, and there was this big escalator in Brown Building run by UNC students. They dropped my gallon of milk and it splattered everywhere. I rode down the escalator and began to hurry to make my way back to the classroom, for my one and a half hours to finish the test were almost up. I got there just as it had ended, and my professor started talking about how disappointed she was in some people. I just stared at my empty test...but for some reason, someone else had written a bunch of stuff on it--maybe getting me partial credit, but no doubt they crossed the line of academic dishonesty. I was so sad and angry at myself for making me fail this test. Then I heard my real-life alarm clock ring, and still sleeping, I got excited. "Maybe this was all a dream and when I wake for for real, I'll get a chance to not fail my test!" I woke up. There was no test.

Even before college, I always used to have this dream. The dream that I couldn't find my classes on the first day of school. Before sophomore year, it happened again. I knew I had Introduction to Geophysics at 9, but that's it. I lost my schedule and slept in the first day of school. I was horrified. But there was free pie in the Maple Lobby, so it was okay.
I once dreamed I was a Geophysics and Geology double major. I woke up disturbed.

I was just informed of my score on the Physics free-response question. So that night, I dreamed of the possibilities of what the TAs marked me down on. I dreamed that they didn't like my drawing of a box. In real life, they liked my drawing of a dinosaur.

I had an Econ exam the Wednesday after Thanksgiving Break. So during the break one night a dreamed that it was late Tuesday night/early Wednesday morning and I had not studied for the Econ test and was certain to fail. It was horrible. In real life, it was also horrible.

On a Friday night, I had a dream that someone turned in a 19-page article for the Oredigger I had to edit. I thought to myself, "We can't print this", but still edited it. I had a hunch that the writer copied and pasted, or plainly downloaded the pdf from somewhere else. Either that or they were a huge nerd about the topic they were writing about.

The night after my Calc III final, I was still doing Calc in my dreams. There was a Stoke's Theorem problem, and I was finding the curl.

In the early weeks of my first summer internship, I had a dream that I was in a new room for a Geophysics class- my first one, so it must've been AEM- waiting for class to start, when I realized that I never bought new school supplies and had to use loose-leaf paper. Terry was disappointed in me.

The week after the first Dynamic Fields midterm, I dreamed that I got my test back and it had "90" written on the front. I knew I failed this test, so I was quite weirded out that I had scored so high. But upon further inspection, the 9 was actually a 4 because Andre's handwriting is so confusing. So it made more sense to me that I had gotten a 40. In real life, I got a 50.

I had a dream about fracking one night. I could see a 2D cross-section as it was happening.

At field camp, I would dream about being out in the field. Mostly doing mundane things, like walking the line taking magnetic measurements.

After the 2014 AGU Fall Meeting, where I orally presented my research that had to do with geomagnetic storms, I had a dream that I was back at the meeting, but this time had a poster presentation and was explaining my research to some famous scientist lady. I was pretty intimidated. In a sub-dream, I was in a city somewhere, and could see the northern lights.

I dreamed that Colton took over MIT's supercomputer. No big deal.

While I was a grader for Intro GravMag, I had a dream that I was a TA for field camp to help with processing GravMag, so only the second half of field camp. I knew that Michael should have been Field Camp Dictator because his reports were always great in GravMag. So I show up to CTLM and Michael is on the Gravity team. I was very disturbed, thinking that this shouldn't happen. Plus Michael told me the pair of students who were dictator, and that disturbed me even more. I told Michael my dream, and in real life he became Dictator a few months later.

I dreamed that I was looking out the one Green Center window, and a tornado was coming down. Mick was teaching in GC215 (maybe he was heading up a study session?), and announced that there was a fire. So there was a fire and tornado at the same time. Great.

During Spring Break senior year, in the midst of a monstrous assignment, I dreamed that I was working on my Inversion code in MATLAB. It didn't work.

My LAIS teacher didn't like my final presentation in my dream, and made me give another one. On a completely different topic, I think.

It might be a long time before I heal from the emotional damage caused by the process of obtaining a Mines degree. I will likely have similar dreams forever. But for now, I'm okay with that.

A Haiku About My Life

caffeine to wake up
school school school school food school school
yay melatonin

Pressure Gradients and Uncertainty

Lately, I've been losing sleep. Part of it is Nyquil withdrawal. I was sick for two weeks straight (since Thanksgiving week), so I was on Nyquil cough syrup for those same two weeks so the cough attacks would have a less chance of shaking me from my sleep. Unfortunately for my sleep schedule, the end of the semester also coincides with me pumping caffeine into my blood system.

The other part of it are the things that take up my thoughts. Thoughts of mostly uncertainty in data analysis and uncertainty in life. At least the semester is almost over.

Oh. The semester is almost over.

The M on Mount Zion in Golden has a countdown each semester to the number of days until graduation for the last nine days. We've now seen it seven times.

"Look at the M. Next time it will be for us."

***

A rallying cry for the Geophysics Junior's hardest class that we Seniors stumbled into

It is during the last ten minutes of a last final of the week that one probably is the most unmotivated. I was particularly unmotivated during this semester's last one, for it was an open computer final and had concepts that contradicted fundamentals from the final I just took an hour earlier.

Plus my hand hurt from writing so much. Even though I stayed up until 2AM studying on accident, I wasn't stressed out about finals. I have done it so many times by now. I was more stressed out about getting my talk finished and everything else. After Tuesday...I would be relaxed.

***

The semester is now over, and the tail end of the year quickly following after it. My sources of December stress are resolved, but uncertainty carries into 2015.

The year I graduate college. The year I start grad school...somewhere.

I was able to reset my sleeping schedule at the AGU Fall Meeting, ironically. Usually people don't get much sleep at giant earth science conferences, but the first two days had me waking up at 6:30AM to prepare for my talk, which was on Tuesday afternoon.

This AGU Fall Meeting was my second, but already was very different from my first, when I was overwhelmed by the bigness of geoscience and taking in the amazing facets of our field of study. This year, my Fall Meeting was defined by prep for my talk and networking. And sushi. I ate sushi twice. (Can I just say how much I love that NSF supports my caffeine and food habit?)

Networking is actually cool because these are my kind of nerds: from people who sing and write poems about geoscience to people who I might be working with in the future. My week was also busy catching up with multiple circles of friends that converged at AGU: Mines Geophysics peeps, 2014 REU friends, and 2013 REU friends. 

My talk went well, and though it was a lot of pressure, it was a huge honor and actually a lot of fun to give. I ended up being up a lot less nervous than I expected it being my first AGU talk. Probably because I was singing in my head the entire talk before mine.

"Ain't no mountain high enough..."

***

It's my last trip of the year. From my first trip of driving through the Arizona desert during Spring Break and receiving the email that I was accepted to the Haystack REU, to the drive to Field Camp, DEN to BOS, BOS to SEA, SEA to BOS, BOS to YYC, driving back from Calgary, DEN to SFO, SFO to DEN.

What's next?

I can't begin to think about going back to school right now and starting my final semester at Mines and all the uncertainty beyond that. I just want to stare at geology from thirty thousand miles above the ground.

The Sierra Nevadas

Ain't Nobody Got Time for That!

It was the second week where I have stayed up waaaaay too late on a Sunday night in order to (partially) complete the assignments due the next day. The combination of Java programs, EPICS projects, Static Fields readings and homework, DiffEq worksheet, DiffEq book problems, Oredigger editing and writing, and remembering to live has made me a very busy, crazy, and sometimes overwhelmed person. As a result, I've gotten 3 hours of sleep Sunday nights. It's not that I've been slacking during the week, rather I had worked on the EPICS project, filled out research internship applications, did homework due other days  (Linear Algebra worksheet and reading quiz Wednesday, Static Fields...). You get the picture. There's no time for anything.

• Laundry
• Exercise 
• Eating
• Sleeping
• Having fun
• Reading the book in order to do the homework
• Actually doing the homework
• Paying attention in class (some classes I use to get homework done in due in a couple hours...it's bad).
• Seeing friends
• Talking to friends
• Hanging out with friends
• Breathing
• Personal hygiene (somewhat kidding)
• Blogging

Sorry.

I do try on some of them. I do try. 

I'm Already Dying...

I suppose I should offer an explanation on why I haven't written this semester yet, even though it is the third week of school. But I don't want to, so there.

Honestly, I guess I'm okay. Maybe.

Maybe not. But probably.

I can feel how terrible and horrendous of a decision 18.5 credits consisting of 6 classes will be. I knew it'd be awful, but if it's like this with just homework going on and not even exams....

God help me.

The mornings are okay. I hate getting up to see the sun rise, so I wake up 20 minutes after. My first two classes are interesting, but I'm just so tired because of the earliness and the fact that it's two straight hours of programming (Java and Matlab). Then Linear Algebra happens and sometimes I don't even know what we're talking about. But it wakes me up. My other classes are great and interesting as well. I love learning.

But then after classes and the meetings and places I need to be due to extracurricular stuff or just meeting with people, the homework comes. And as much as I've attempted to not procrastinate, homework continues to prove its infiniteness and complexity.

Okay, maybe it's not that bad. I totally like school. Imagine if I was doing nothing right now, wouldn't I want to go back to school? But I forget the emotional terror after each semester. A coping mechanism, I guess.

It was a rough first half of the week, I guess. It's not over, our first EPICS project is due Friday. I've been in the process of applying to REUs (research experience for undergraduates), so that's on my plate as well. I had to finish a couple personal statements last night, and that took me 'til 4a.m. No big deal, I've stayed up later than that. But never with 8a.m. class the next day. Due to insomnia and other terrible factors and caffeine, I couldn't fall asleep til like 5. So I got like 2.5 hours of sleep.

I feel like I'm gonna die now, although I really want to work on Java (it's a fun class). I just feel weird. Yeah, I'm gonna go to bed before I start twitching.

Four Final Days

This couldn't end well. The first question was bizarre: "There are M amount of positive charges in the universe and N amount of negative charges, and both have a magnitude of e. If two charges of magnitude e appear, what is the total charge in the universe?" I could not give an electric flux about the charges in the universe, I just wanted to do well on the last Physics exam I'd ever take. Questions baffled me. I didn't have my minty gum, rather I freaked out in the morning when I couldn't find it, then ran to the book store and bought some fruity gum. Bad decision. The Red Bull and Honey Bunches of Oats breakfast combo was fine, my focus was alright, but they didn't help on the weird problems. I wish I had more time to study the day (and week) before.

***

I barely woke up Tuesday morning. It was 7 a.m., and I'd gotten 4 hours of sleep. I thought about calculating my grade if I slept in and got a 0 on the Economics final. It wasn't good, so I reluctantly rolled out of bed, chugged some yogurt, ate the rest of my Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and cracked open a Red Bull as I meandered to Brown Building to take the test. The TAs were ten minutes late. I was tired, and  not amused. So tired, I don't remember much of that test. I was pretty out of it. I went back home and took a nap.

Tuesday evening: the last night of studying for exams for me. "All I need is a 76," Shane kept saying. After about the 5th time everybody wanted him to shut up. I tried to learn optics in one night, and was pretty successful as I went over homework while I ate the pizza we ordered. Eventually Lon-Capa went down, so we had to find creative ways to study for physics. I should have looked over the past homework, for "Hairpin Curve" would be on the final. But my professor had told me that a good night's sleep and good attitude was going to help me on the final, so I opted to get 7 hours of sleep. Brandon took me home at one.

***
My geology professor was probably printing out our finals, as he was late. "If you take the full two hours to complete this, there's something wrong!" he had said, so it was okay I guess. I sipped my Starbucks; the weather was cold and windy outside this Monday morning. He finally showed up, and we didn't take a whole lot of time to finish. "Extra credit: draw your favorite dinosaur!" I laughed.

Panino's and more Starbucks with Rima kept me going for lunch. It was great to relax with a friend even though my worst finals hadn't taken place yet. When I got back, my family dropped my off a huge care package of food.

I tried to learn Econ as I Skyped my friend at the Starbucks in Brown later. I was a hopeless case in this subject, but it did help. Brady texted me that his Calc final grade was up, so I checked mine. It wasn't up. But Geology scores were.

I got a 75. I was in denial, but I read my prof's message. He was curving the class by 1.7 percent.

I was excited, but I couldn't dwell on that for too long. Econ was tomorrow. Physics, more importantly, was Wednesday.

But first our Bible Study was going out for Pho for dinner. It was a great time to hang out and get hot soup, for it had been a great semester. The weather was getting colder too, so that warmed us up.

Exams were looming though, so afterwards I texted Brandon. Studying for Econ was for naught, we decided. The more one studies, the less one understands. He picked me up and another late night studying at the Stoop was ahead. "I got an A in Calc!" Shane said. "I need a 76 on physics, do you think I can get that?"

We studied physics until about midnight, then switched to Econ. It was snowing. 'Bout time. Brandon drove me home, and we noticed the snowplows hadn't been out yet. "The key to driving in the snow is to not freak out," he said as he drove sideways in the CTLM parking lot. "No big deal, just driving sideways." It was fun, as it was one of the first snow falls of the year and there was no one awake at that time. There rarely is at 2 a.m. Even the study room in Maple was not lit up as it was so frequently last year.

***
I walked from Marquez Hall to Brown Sunday night, the place where I spent most of my time this semester. I was just coming from studying for my geology final with classmates, but needed to go over the time scale and maybe some Econ.  I needed a 76 on Geology, and was concerned about not getting it. Alone in Brown, I wrote and rewrote the time scale in hopes of finally memorizing it. I hated studying alone. Maybe it helps focus, but certainly not motivation. I missed having people to study with every night without fail in the Maple study room. Maybe I just hate being alone.

I thought about how different this semester was. With only two more credit hours than the last, I was twice as busy, yet still managed to sleep some of the time. We had split off into majors, although not as completely as we will Spring semester. I missed old friends, had made new friends. Learned more intense stuff, lived more real life. Had kids look up to me as an old, grizzled sophomore yet couldn't get by without the wisdom of those older than me. The semester flew by quite quickly. I was surprised, no, blessed that I got through without too many battle scars.

Three down, five more to go...

They Said It Ain't Gonna Be Easy...

Hi people.

I've been really busy. I've been really tired. I've kind of been stressed. A lot of things go on and I don't get time to sit. But here we go.

(Dang I need to see when the last time I posted was and what I posted about....Oh that, haha.)

I'm already in the midst of "midterms" (which doesn't mean anything other than they are the second round of tests). Everybody's been freaking out. Especially those poor people who aren't Geophysics majors (or CompSci, or Math, or Electrical I think). I only have two tests this week plus my NHV paper (which I guess is a pretty major thing). I don't know. It's rough. I've had so much homework due so I don't study until late at night and as a result, don't sleep. I work my brain to mush for physics and then come out of the test dead. And I didn't even freak out during the test- must've been hard. Others concur. I reason that with the amount of guessing I did, I got a 55. The average turns out to be 57.

They said it wasn't going to be easy.

I knew that, but I thought it'd take a couple semesters for the average on an exam to be failing. It sucks, because I work so hard and now I'm sure of certain failure (which I now realize is repetitiously redundant). I feel like punching everyone I know that goes to non-engineering school in the face, which is extreme, I know but not as extreme as talking about assisted and attempted suicides for the kids that just took that test. Yes, it was that hard- some of you will not understand and I am glad for you. Lon-Capa takes forever to load and then finally does. I am never so happy to not fail a test.

And then I try to study two chapters of Calculus II material for the test today (this was yesterday). And then stay up 'til 4.

They said I'd have to work hard and late.

I never knew what that was. But now, I have to study everything before a test. Which reminds me, I have one in an hour and a half.

***

That test was easy. Way too easy in fact, that I know I screwed up and made a bunch of stupid mistakes and solved this one problem "The Physics Way" because that's the right way to. But it's over, and it was a big fat piece of chocolate cake compared to the physics exam.

We'll see. Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good. Like in Physics, I guessed three questions right out of six unknown with 5 different options each. Math you gotta know your stuff. So for luck you do your routine, maybe. My routine is eating dinner (I mostly have a post-test routine) and praying really really hard (it was only by the grace of God I got a decent grade on Physics). I have a CSM Department of Physics pencil I use for all things Physics. And for Math and CompSci I usually wear a baseball cap to the exam so I don't pull all my hair out- Physics assumes anyone wearing anything but clothes is a cheater and liar and out to kill people, so I don't wear a hat to that, obviously. Last Math test I wore my oldest Rockies hat, and tonight I wore my newest Mines hat. We'll see how this one performs- I gotta break it in. Anyways. I use yellow or orange colors of pencils for Math, because that's what color I think it is (Physics is blue, Chem would be red...).Water is good, but only sometimes. I like to be awake during my exams so sometimes I caffeinate up. And I don't look at the exam or try to read it turned over before we're supposed to. A lot of times, I don't even look ahead (especially for Physics) while doing it. And usually I have success with not freaking out.

It's weird having to think during an exam. There is always one (or 20) questions that will rack your brain. If you don't have a headache afterward, you're doing it wrong. And it's always funny when you score lower on the subject you work everything for than the others. But back to thinking- I don't think I ever thought or reasoned through any test in highschool (or kindergarten for that matter); they were just so easy. Formulas: memorize and bam. If I got an A-, I was doing it wrong. How things change. I guess it's good. I hope it's not too unhealthy. If it's not I have time to catch up on sleep for a couple days.

So the battle's half-way over. It was not easy.

They say the third Physics test is easy...

Time to study for an A in the class.

Just Another Ordinary Week at Mines

Brady and I finished Lon-Capa last Thursday night. I was proud of us. But I still had my Computer Science 101 homework to do that was due Friday. The thing was- a blizzard was expected to sweep through the Denver Metro area. And although I knew Mines never, ever gave snowdays off, I was counting on it all evening until I gave in and decided to do my homework. It started snowing- a lot. But not enough. So I did my homework, and went to sleep at around 2 a.m. This set the tone for the coming week.

I didn't have to wake up until 10:30 on Friday anyway..but when Sara told me class got canceled, I got so happy and fell back asleep. I awoke to two texts asking if I wanted to go sledding. People were in the hallway of my floor sitting and talking because there was no school. I looked outside and was surprised Mines canceled even though it was blizzard conditions. I put on my ski goggles and a skirt and went sledding. That's right.

When we got to Sorority Hill, I realized there was a lot of snow. Like, dude. It made a bank at the beginning of the parking lot and when you reached the bottom, you were covered. There were quite a few people up there already including some of my Bradford friends and some IV kids. We made a huge chain of disks and long sleds and everything else and went down at once- yeah, it was crazy.

Krista told us her great idea about ambushing the Sparkly Mancave...so after getting food from the Cruplex and sitting and drinking hot chocolate, we got a text that the Sparkly Man Cave residents were going to be sledding also...hmmm, the perfect time for an attack?

Seven of us went down to the Cave. Us three girls stayed on level ground, while the guys decided to built forts and arsenals on top of the roof. Yes, the roof. We packed the snow and engineered the trenches in the Cave's backyard and waited for them to return. A call was received...the response was given to not be suspicious: "Just chillin' with peeps". Indeed, it was chilly. Daniel got back and saw one of the guys on the roof. No biggie- just a friend on the roof, having a conversation. Then someone yelled, "This is Sparta!!" and we attacked with our awesome snowballs. Some more friends were expected to arrive from the front, so we made some more walls and waited. And waited. And got wet. And waited. And got cold. And shyly looked up when the targets finally arrived..."oh hi, there...".

Our jean fabric garments were not very comfortable, so we dried them and played Halo. I like guns. But I'm horrible, so playing with a few noobs was fun. Big guns are even better. And sniping. Aw, yeah. Connor and John walked it to find their houses overtaken with Halo playing people, some of which with fashionable blanket skirts. Some of us decided we were hungry so we went to Woody's and all had the buffet. Then we went back to our respective residences for a little while until going back to the cave for game night, and fashionably so. I remember being so tired though...walking up and down a hill is a lot of work- more than I do in PA.

And that was Friday, and that was epic. I woke up with the same amount of homework and tests coming up, but one less day to complete preparations for them. Here's what I had on my plate:

• Mathematica Project
• CompSci assignment
• Two weeks worth of Calculus homework due for a quiz
• Nature and Human Values paper
• Nature and Human Values extra credit paper (well...I never got to that, so I'll do it this week)
• Another CompSci assignment
• Physics studying (practice problems, test, studio)
• Math Worksheet
• Math studying (notecard and practice tests)
• NHV debate prep about GMOs
• Yet another CompSci assignment
• Laundry (to be continued)

How was I supposed to do this? One day at a time, I guess. I woke up early on Saturday and Sunday to get stuff done- which was good. The worst thing I knew looming was the Physics test and the Math homework I had to complete due before that. I studied for Physics most of the time, because it was fun. I revised my NHV paper after that, because that was also fun...not really. My teacher gave the advice "(such and such section) could be more clear". I looked over it and banged my head against the desk because I had no idea who wrote this paper and what they were trying to convey. I tried to give it to friends but they didn't know either, but said it was fine. Sigh. I mean, I do my best writing past midnight, but apparently before 3 a.m. It was kinda bad.

After Sunday morning, I had nearly done all the practice problems for Physics. So as much as I didn't want to move on to studying another subject, I had to get some Math done. Some IV kids were getting together for the Super Bowl. We brought homework and were actually surprisingly productive between cheering for Tom Brady's legs to break and watching commercials. Still- math never ends. So yeah, I stayed up late Sunday, but not as late as some. Good thing I did Capa (but that also means I got to help people with it too). 

Wake up. Classes. Lunch. Classes. Some homework. Dinner. A lot of homework/studying. Get to bed at 3. Repeat.

Physics test was fun, but challenged me mentally. It also didn't help that I started freaking out a half hour before. And the kids waiting outside of Metals Hall were being so loud...it's funny how kids act when they know they're about to fail a test. But anyway, I freaked out and stopped having the capacity to think until I got to the projectile motion problem, smiled, and went on. Phys I scores are posted the morning after (and I was almost up when they posted them). So I couldn't sleep soundly, not to mention just getting 6 hours after having to do the Math Worksheet. Whatevs. 

Wednesday...oh gosh. Normal stuff all the way til it came time to study for Calculus II- the worst math class known to normal mankind. I had t -20 hours to learn everything. I was so screwed. A few of us on the 1st North had the same test and occupied the study room: the room I had barely left the past week. I came to terms I would likely not get to sleep hardly at all. But thought about my schedule the following morning and then came to terms this would not be the night to pull my first non-recreational all-nigher. I started writing out my notecard, but it was looking like everything wouldn't fit on it. So I took notes of my 8923843298 thus far pages of notes, and then took notes of those and made my notecard. 3 a.m. I started working over a past test. I yawned. "Let me give you a Red Bull. Stay up with me," Brandon pleaded. I declined, knowing I needed some sleep. So at 4:45 I finally gave up and Brandon ended being Survivor: Mines Study Room while pulling an all-nighter. I still couldn't sleep. 5 o'clock, and I can't sleep?! I thought about how much this sucked.  And then thought if I'd remember that night, or if I'd remember the fun part of the night with all of us there, laughing every so often, working hard, hearing stories of superstition, and realizing "I'm in section F....that can't be good!" (cries).

I woke up alive and energized, but I still thought I was doomed. Maybe a little less now that I had studied, but still doomed. (Not sure if I went to Digger Den and bought two glasses of Starbucks then, or Tuesday....). But I was awake all day. Got through NHV debate. Realized I forgot to do an assigned reading and muttered "Oh, crap" under my breath as she passes out the quizzes. But yeah. I was pretty much reviewing up until exam time, something I never like to do (I have my pre-test routine, yo). But got through it. And was so, so happy when it was all over and did my post-test routine and when to Digger Den. Then we ended up having a jam session in Maple into the wee hours way past the time when the music practice room is supposed to be open. 

Yeah, tons of craziness this full week. And then I woke up and did my last CompSci assignment for the week.  Luckily I have work tomorrow (Go Orediggers!), RA interviews Sunday, and only the CompSci test this week. Only. Oh, and laundry. 

Back In the Swing of Things...Not Yet

Even though I had nothing to lose sleep over or no reason to wake up early, I tossed and turned last night until I could finally wake up and take a shower. I ache all over. My XL lofted twin in Maple has nothing on my King pillow-top at home.

So here I write, midnight Friday, and pretty tired from the week that was the first back.

I have all new classes, with a bunch of new people. Highlights: I love all my professors so far, and the times at which my classes take place are the best they can be. Even though I think two classes will be a challenge (Physics and Calc II), the other two seem like they will be fun and easy (Nature & Human Values and Intro to CompSci). Of course, they assigned homework already, but I finished Physics before I went out and had fun tonight and the other assignments are spaced reasonably.

I'm getting the hang of it. Even though I forgot how to integrate in Physics studio, I'm sure I'll be back in the swing of things by next week.
***
I suppose you can say I enjoy watching football. Root for the hometeam Broncos, even. But I payed no attention to it last semester (actually I didn't pay that much attention to baseball, but that was because the Rockies ceased to play it in July). Weekends are study time, afterall.

So this Tim Tebow guy starts and apparently makes the Broncos win (even though we all know Matt Prater is the MVP of everybody....kidding, kinda....naw). So I continue to study, even though my relatives seem to think that I should watch Tim Tebow as my duty as a former homeschooler and something else. Whatever.

School ends, I go back home, and watch football. Tim "All He Does is Win" Tebow can't throw. Three weeks later, the Broncos eek into the playoffs without winning. The day before I go back to school some miracle happens and the Broncos win. I don't know what to say.

The game is tomorrow. I'm unsure if I'll watch it. I'm pretty sure the Broncos will lose, but most of Tim Tebow's miraculous comebacks have come without me watching and doing school. We'll see.

I should enjoy this concept of playoff football, but I'm just so anxious...to get back in the swing of things.

Why Did I Come Here Again?

I still can't believe it's November already. I can't believe I'm this old- a "college kid". I still can't believe I'm here at Mines, actually doing this stuff. It's crazy. Midterms finally ended. I can't believe the next round of tests is just around the corner. I can't believe I've made it this far and am still loving it.

There are still times, though. Times where you are in the midst of trying to complete a ton of assignments, while maybe studying for the test coming up. Times you wish you had more cash, or that you already graduated and were rich. Times you wish your floor was more social, or you didn't have all this homework keeping you from just doing things from friends. Times the laundry piles up, and the dumpster outside seems so far away, except for trash day when the trucks wake you up at 6. Times that annoying people annoy you while being annoying. Times you want just one more hour of sleep. Or that your brain would stop working during the designated time for sleep.

College is crazy, man. Mines is crazy. Life is crazy. During those difficult times, the thought goes through our heads: "Why did I come here again?". Other friend's from different colleges complaints about music class's unbearable difficulty sicken us. Or their fear of failing underwater basket weaving- I mean, come on. And we're here learning to be helluva, helluva, helluva, helluva, helluva engineers. The land of evil Chem TA's that make students write 15 hour lab reports and professors that put you to sleep after lunch and EPICS teachers with evil laughs and jokes that aren't funny. The place where math never ends in any subject, except for the few liberal arts writing courses that everyone complains about anyway because they are, well, liberal arts writing courses. The poor nerdy guys can't find a girlfriend. And school is so hard.

Then we remember where we are. But we still try to remember why.

"I like science", "I got the free application", "I wanted to be an engineer since I was two", "I...really don't know" we manage to say. I really do like science, and didn't want to pay to write an essay to apply for college. I always thought Mines was for crazy geniuses, and never considered it until Junior year in highschool. And then suddenly I wanted a good education and a college experience and a high paying job at the end.

Somehow it turned out to be more than that. This sounds cliche, but: I love the small community of Mines, and the fact that we are all here for science, math, and engineering. (Except for Econ majors. I met one. They exist...kinda.) I love how we accept and promote each other's nerdisms. I love that Golden is a pretty town that doesn't stink most of the time. And yeah, it's good that our hard work will turn into a degree that matters.

I'll say it again: time flies. When it's all said and done, will we even remember the evenings at Solid Works session? Or the failed chem labs? And that time will come so soon, if we just enjoy it. And it will all be worth it. One day.

Five Hours?! It Has Come to This

Oh....
I'm so...tired.

I was going to take a lot of pictures this week of Maple and write about that, but I haven't had time to take a lot of pictures. And it would've been so appropriate too, with all the #mapleproblems we have. (That is completely a joke, for you all without senses of humor, or with extreme jealousy.) But here I am, and all I have to say is I'm tired.

I think this week has been the first week I can identify a subtle routine. Classes are in full force, homework abounds, and I work 10 hours a week, all while attempting to have a social life. I know when I need to eat, and schedule my life around free food. I know what assignments I have, and I know each weekend I'll still have homework to do...sigh. I do laundry and take the trash and recyclables each Sunday. I hate Mondays, with its full schedule. After classes, I prepare the lab for the next day. I work on Tuesday, then go to Chem lab. Then I read the entirety of Chemistry Chapter Three. Tuesday evenings are InterVarsity Christian fellowship large group meetings. It's a good way to forget about school for a little while, but after that I have to prepare anything due for EPICS on Wednesday. I eat at the SWE (Society of Women Engineers) meetings for lunch Wedsnesday. In the evening there are the small group Bible Studies (next week we're breaking in the Maple grill and BBQing!). On Thursday...I think I try to do Calc homework, but usually end by printing the worksheet out and feeling good about myself for accomplishing something. MAC (Mines Activity Council) puts on  a movie every Thursday night, and so far I've gone to them all (I've seen Thor, Pirates 4, and Super 8 so far). Friday- oh gosh. I hate Fridays. I begin at work, then lunch/ meetings with a lunch, then my classes. At 6, Sara- my roommate and fellow EPICS team member- and I continue our tradition of "Things I'd Rather Be Doing Right Now On This Friday Rather Than Walking to EPICS". Like sleeping, studying, or drowning...heck, way better than EPICS on a Friday. Then finally the week ends, and I usually celebrate and have a lot of fun on Friday nights...which is bad because I have to wake up at 7 on Saturdays for work.

Which is where I am now, fresh (groggy) off a nap and seven hours of work at the football game. I know it's stupid to stay up 'til 2a.m. My alarm clock tell me so: "Your alarm is set to go off 5 hours, 10 minutes from now". Gah. And then (with apologies to Charlie Blackmon) I have to roll out of bed without rolling out of bed, look in the mirror and squint to see greatness. Work was alright today. In fact, it was kind of fun. The football team dominated 55-7, which was great. I was sideline security, which meant I had to prevent streakers or otherwise non-authorized people from going onto the field. Everyone was in a jolly mood and decently sober, so I did not have that problem. Unfortunately, I fell asleep in my chair for the final five minutes, and would've been unaware of spectators exploiting my tiredness and running across the field. But they had their chance and missed it.

I actually did do a little homework today, but out of bad judgement brought my pillow into the study room and fell asleep. Curse you, Isaac Newton and Gottfried Leibniz for inventing Calculus and making the most potent sleep aid ever. My neck started hurting, and I just went to bed. Since then I have straightened my room and written a blog post.

Experts say you can only have three of the following at Mines: good grades, social life, or sleep. Coming in, I thought I'd get 8 hours (OH, THE HUMANITY!) and work very hard to get good grades, and maybe schedule fun into there somewhere. I'm decently organized now, but have scheduled fun somewhere almost every night, and still manage to turn in my assignments on time (so far). And now I've become one of those people who wake up early every morning even though their schedule doesn't require them to and gets an average of 5 hours of sleep. It has come to this.

I'm gonna need more coffee.